Friday, April 23, 2010

SYTYCD - Season 7

Let's face it: the last couple of seasons of So You Think You Can Dance have been pretty lackluster. Me, I say it has to do with the personalities of the contestants. Yes, we've seen some really amazing dancers on the SYTYCD stage over the last two outings, but nobody has come close to the sheer "I gotta see their next routine" charisma or adorability of their predecessors (in particular, the superlative class of season 4). Also, there's the absence of Mia Michaels' work from the show. I don't think there's any fan of the show or dancing in general who will argue that Mia's routines are regularly the most creative and interesting pieces of each week she was contributing. Without her, although the other choreographers are all spectacular, no one is Mamma Mia.

Apparently, Fox disagrees with me. They're changing the format of the show drastically for the upcoming season.

+The auditions and Vegas week will whittle the contestants down to just 10 rather than 20, and then the live elimination shows will begin.

+Only one contestant will be eliminated each week.

+Contestants will change partners every week from the start of the live shows.

And the biggest change,

+Contestants will not be dancing with one another, but rather rotating through a cast of "All-Stars": finalists from previous seasons. The press calls them former "favorites", a name I question. Our so-called All-Stars are:

1. "Twitch" Boss, season 4. Okay, a genuine favorite. I really liked him.
2. Comfort Fedoke, season 4. NO thank you. Dancing okay, but I hated that she got a second shot.
3. Courtney Galliano, season 4. Not bad. But not that big a deal, either.
4. Anya Garnis, season 3. Eh. But then, I've not been impressed by any of the show's female ballroom dancers.
5. Lauren Gottlieb, season 3. More eh. Never really did much for me.
6. Neil Haskell, season 3. Who? Oh, the table, battle-of-the-sexes number.
7. Allison Holker, season 2. Who? Oh, the umbrella routine.
8. Mark Kanemura, season 4. Yay, another actual favorite. "Bleeding Love" forever.
9. Pasha Kovalev, season 3. Eh. Same goes for the show's guy ballroom dancers.
10. Kathryn McCormick, season 6. Who? Oh, squeaky voice.
11. Ade Obayomi, season 5. Good, but no big deal.
12. Dominic "D-trix" Sandoval, season 3. If they were going to get someone from Quest Crew, who not Hok? I loved Hok.

So, in short... bleh. I'm ready for this season to come hopefully they'll cast some people I'll want to watch because these changes are ridiculous.

DWTS - S10 Week 5

It's Movie Night, and the intro to the show is in letterbox format, and we see they've added a huge LCD screen that stretches across the top of the stage. ABC is not skimping this season for sure. The couples' descent down the stairs is a parade of awful dresses, with the exception being Anna Trebunskaya (as usual). They rarely seem to be able to find anything that makes the woman look less than adorable.


Niecy & Louis: "La Bamba", Jive (Jive?!) She hates having been called "boring" and doesn't think she can go through his legs. Her stamina is tested. No snap or sharpness during the dance, but on time. Dead arm. Slightly better expression than last week. 18/30

Chad & Cheryl: "I Wanna Be Like You" (from The Jungle Book), Quickstep. She's getting less jokey and flirty, so he thinks she's pissed. The dance has good speed and lightness, but needs better footwork. Weak frame, his head looking way too high. 18/30

In the Skybox, when Brooke asks about the tension in rehearsal, they're both very quick and very curt about saying nothing was wrong. Hmm.

Erin & Maks: "You Never Can Tell" (from Pulp Fiction), Jive. Maks supposedly in charge this week, but they're still arguing in a cute and funny way. Music starts slow. When it picks up, god timing and speed, lots of character. Needs strength and sharpness. 22/30

Apolo & Julianne did it way better.

In the Skybox, Brooke asks about the cute arguing and asks if there's romance in the air. Erin: "Not until Maks gets me a ring like Chad got Cheryl."

Jake & Chelsie: "Old Time Rock & Roll" (from Risky Business), Cha Cha. He needs to get out of the analytical brain. Gratuitous shirtlessness from him. Starts with semi-gratuitous pantslessness. Good connection & musicality, decent footwork. Solid. 24/30

Pamela & Damian: "9 to 5", Quickstep. She says (correctly) she's built for a Fellini or Russ Meyers movie. Also testing her stamina. Dance has good character. Nice speed, good trick over table. Strengthen frame and improve footwork all over. 20/30

Kate & Tony: "Don't You Forget About Me" (from The Breakfast Club), Foxtrot. She has no energy and is yawning, and is no help at all. Tony looks fed up and exhausted. Very slow and easy through dance, just walking without drive or purpose. 12/30

Bruno: "That dance doesn't deserve a critique, it deserves a postmortem!"

And seriously, who's never watched The Breakfast Club or seen someone do that hold-your-nose-and-swim dance move? Yeesh.

In the audience: Buzz Aldrin.

Nicole & Derek: "Oh, Pretty Woman", Tango (Tango?!). She needs to remember to have fun and relax. They go Beverly Hills shopping. Dance has great attack and awesome frame, great follow. Excellent footwork. Sharp and precise, maybe slightly rushed. 28/30

Evan & Anna: "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" (from Armageddon), Rumba. Traveling on Stars of Ice tour all over country. A challenge to do hip action. Excellent arms and lines, and hips improving. Great connection and better flow, better feet. 26/30

RESULTS SHOW

We're doing that everyone-on-the-stairs, call-down-two-couples thing again for some reason. They start with the top and bottom of the leaderboard.

Safe: Nicole & Derek.

RED LIGHT OF DOOOOOOOOOOM: Kate & Tony (for the first time, which... I just don't know).

Review of the night: Again, Len all smiles as he basically repeats everything from last night. He just out and says he's liking the battle at the top between Nicole & Evan best. After their 29, we see Derek whooping it up so much he falls off his stool.

Encore: Jake & Chelsie's Cha-Cha. I admire his ability to put on pants that quickly while wearing Latin-heeled dance shoes. Meanwhile, she's having wardrobe issues with the top of her dress, hitching it up constantly.

Music guest: Maxwell, "Fistful of Tears". Pretty good R&B stuff, accompanied by a Theatre Arts couple, Tyne Stecklein and Teddy Forance. They're young and look like they're enjoying it and really performing (especially her).

Down the stairs come the couples tied at 18 points.

Still in "Jeopardy": Chad & Cheryl, Safe: Niecy & Louis.

Adam Corolla's "Between the Mirrorballs".

Stars of Dance: Choreographed by Marguerite Derricks, a medley of pieces from classic movie dances. First, a white-tie-and-tails tribute to Fred Astaire. Then the polyester comes out for a five-man recreation of Saturday Night Fever's iconic solo. Next, we frug with the opening dance from Austin Powers. Awesomely, the Debbie Allen reprises her Lydia Grant speech, complete with stick to introduce the finale, to the title song from the Fame remake. Great dancers, great dancing.

Music guest: Debi Nova, "Drummer Boy". Cute girl, so-so voice and catchy song. But she does get Damian, Derek, Tony and Dimitry to dance around and up on her (open shirt count: 2, Damien & Dimitry).

Video: Next week, the celebs get to design the costumes.

Next two highest scoring couples come down. Safe: Evan & Anna. SiJ: Jake & Chelsie.

Two more couples. Safe: Erin & Maks (he celebrates). SiJ: Pamela & Damian.

Pointless re-review. Safe: Jake & Chelsie, Chad & Cheryl (delayed reaction, didn't hear? \o/ took a while). RLOD: Pamela & Damian.

Safe: Pamela & Damian.

Eliminated: Kate Gosselin & Tony Dovolani. Kate apparently speechless and in tears. It could be genuine and sincere... but maybe not. They forgo the last dance to keep talking. Whatever, she's gone.
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Friday, April 16, 2010

DWTS - S10 Week 4

So that promise I made to myself to avoid Twitter before shows? I swear I'll do it next week. Advance buzz this time though, is that Jonathan Roberts is pissed at the judges who are "destroying" the couples with the technical scores. I wouldn't be surprised. The animation for Buzz' elimination is him turning into a rocket and blasting off. They're calling it "Passion Night" because our dances are Tango and Rumba. Brooke, sadly, has her first bad dress of the season... and as the couples come down, she's not the only one.

The judges discuss the dancers and the dances we'll be seeing, starting with their expectations for Tango, leaving it to Tom for some reason to specify that the three required figures for the dance will be the Viennese Cross, Continuous Outside Swivels and the Contra Check. Jonathan and Anna Demidova do a pro demo to the most awful music ever. They do, though, get pyro effects and a "well done" from Len.

Also, Len called out the couples last week to give them specific details he wanted them to work on. For some reason, we don't see all of these.


Erin & Maks: Len's advice-- footwork. She's having back problems and is paranoid about the footwork. Tango. Starts with her hugging Len. Footwork cleaner, good attitude. Not grounded, needs strength and more color. Frame weak. 20/30 technical, 22/30 performance.

In the Skybox, after they're scored 6's for some reason, Brooke asks Maks what he's hoping for in performance. "Twelves?" he asks, incredulous.

Evan & Anna: Len's advice-- footwork & backside. Two broken toes. Focusing on details. Tango. Neat dress for her, good intro with chair. Great strength, good sharpness. Nice leading and attack, better power, better footwork. 26/30 technical, 25/30 performance.

They've got a "Hot! Hot! Hot!" neon sign. Subtle. The judges discuss Rumba. The required figures will be the Spiral to Rope Spinning, Opening Out to Right and Left and the Sliding Doors. To demo are Dmitry Chaplin and Kym Johnson (clad in a Wonderbra, boyshort undies and an unbuttoned shirt that ABC told them she was not allowed to remove at the end of the routine as planned). Tom FTW describing the routine: "three special moves and two percent body fat".

Niecy & Louis: He wants to use dance as therapy, so they dedicate it to her late brother's memory instead of being romantic. She's doing long days. Rumba. Emotional, introspective and low-key. Not quite completing the required elements. Too quiet. 17/30 technical, 21/30 performance.

In the audience: Susan Lucci, Chuck Liddell.

Aiden & Edyta: Len's advice-- be an actor. Shy and introvert in real life. They visit a soap fan cruise. Rumba. Bad tin foil dress. Feeling and acting the dance, but choreography is pose to pose and steps are choppy. Awful hands & arms, no flow or hips. Nothing to do for him again. 18/30 technical, 20/30 performance.

Nicole & Derek: Len's advice-- balance speed and slow. They get the giggles trying to be romantic. He has a "love hand". Rumba. She borrowed a headdress from Headdress Lady in the band. Gorgeous performance, but nerves showing. Great moves, nice tricks and very good lines. 27/30 technical, 25/30 performance.

Tom's on Castle after the show on "ABC: the All Bergeron Channel".

Jake & Chelsie: He has the judges' "3 words" on a t-shirt. Promises to trust her and be assertive. Tango. Good attack and enthusiasm, but a little smiley for Tango. Some good figures. Wow, pivot down stairs! Stumbles late and never finds feet. 20/30 technical, 21/30 performance.

In the Skybox, they've dressed the set with heart-shaped pillows that spend the rest of the episode being held up in the background of shots or flying around the room.

Kate & Tony: She keeps making excuses for her dancing and complaining about her life, saying she wants to "just get through" her routines. Tango. No energy or performance here, but at least the bitchface is appropriate. At least she doesn't look to be fighting him, but is no help. 14/30 technical, 17/30 performance.

Bruno's comment: "For a moment there, I actually believed you were dancing!". Len praises Tony's work, but the lack of criticism stuns her. Tony: "She's speechless, this is great!"

Chad & Cheryl: Looking for posture and romance and softness. He gave Cheryl a massive diamond ring. Rumba. Improved posture, some hip action, good footwork. Better performance, looking out more. Better fluidity, overall solid. 24/30 technical, 22/30 performance.

Pamela & Damien: Len's advice-- make it refined and classy. Timing a challenge with slow tempo. They want sexy but also vulnerable. Rumba. Blue eyeshadow! Really good and sexy in a tender, sweeter way. Great lightness, good hips, good lines. 25/30 technical, 27/30 performance.

Hmmm. I don't think the judges scored some couples right, but I don't think they were "destroying" anyone. Sorry, Jon.

RESULTS SHOW

Brook makes up for last night's dress with a silky number that reminds me of Number Six's iconic red dress from Battlestar Galactica.

Safe: Chad (who hugs Jake before Cheryl, preventing the \o/ ) & Cheryl, Jake (who hugs Chelsie, then Chad) & Chelsie.
Len's review as always is happier than it would seem from the night before. He does mention that he wants "to see more Aiden and less Edyta". Preaching to the choir here, Len. Kate claims she was having fun.

In the audience: Mark Cuban.

Encore: Pamela & Damien's Rumba. From far away, the light-colored eye makeup makes her look better than the super-dark raccoon eyes they usually use on her.

Since next week is "Movie Night" (all the songs will be from movies), we get little mock previews for movies. First up is Tuesday the 13th, with Bruno as a glitter-masked Jason wielding the glitter ball trophy.

Musical guest: Sade (who Tom and Brooke refer to in the plural, as though the entire band is "Sade"), "Baby Father". Chelsie & Damien dance, and I like that they seem to be enjoying themselves. Sade has two backup singers, young women dressed like Urkel with giant neon hair flowers.

Safe: Evan & Anna

Video package of the pros when they were dancing as kids. Lots and lots of cute.

Dance guest: Young ballroom students from VIBE Performing Arts in Utah, including former DWTS Junior Champions Brandon & Brittany as well as dancer Tanisha Belnap, who was in Marks most recent music video, "All For Nothing". They are almost depressingly fantastic.

More "previews": Cha-Chablanca and Glambo: First Dance, the latter of which features Tony at his goofy, silly best.

Safe: Nicole & Derek, Pamela & Damien.

Macy's Stars of Dance: A fantastic fusion piece choreographed by SYTYCD prodigy Travis Wall, who also performs. It features Tiler Peck, a principal dancer from the New York City Ballet as well as SYTYCD alums Danny Tidwell, Nick Lazzarini and Jaimie Goodwin, and is set to music by a hip-hop string section called Nuttin But Stringz. Wow.

Musical guest: Sade, "Sweetest Taboo". Her (their?) own dancers.

Safe: Erin & Maks.

Preview: Dance Another Day, featuring Double-Ocho-Cinco.

Safe: Kate (NOOOOOOOOO!) & Tony, Niecy & Louis.

Eliminated: Aiden Turner & Edyta Sliwinksa. He's freaked out waiting, and all are very surprised at the announcement.

See you next week.
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Friday, April 9, 2010

DWTS - S10 Week 3

So it's the "Storytelling" challenge tonight, and honestly that's a way better idea than most of the gimmicks they've tried before (and a dam sight less confusing than all the stuff they're doing for the upcoming season of So You Think You Can Dance). The couples come down to the floor and I see almost as much male cleavage as female.

Professional demo of the dances we'll see tonight, to the now-to-be-expected atrocious music selection this show is cursed with. Dancing are Jonathan Roberts & Anna Demidova, Valentin Chmerkovskiy & Lacey Schwimmer and Dmitry Chaplin & Snejana Petrova.

In the audience: Marlee Maitlin, Florence Henderson, George Lopez, Helio Castroneves.


Evan & Anna: He asks her to speak in a thicker Russian accent. Quickstep. He starts without her, she's running late. Very cute routine, lots of energy. Very light with good speed. Finesse, nice lead, better posture. Needs more drive and better footwork. 25/30

Buzz & Ashly: He can't understand not thinking about steps and just feeling the movement (I get that). Waltz. He is a war hero coming home to be greeted by his daughter. He feels the music and the story. Can see her cueing and backleading him like a good teacher. 15/30

Jake & Chelsie: Trouble communicating. "Quick, quick... no." Quickstep. Huge props and smoke and costumes. He's running to keep up with the tempo. Okay frame. Stronger footwork and better leg action needed. 20/30

I think it's a little unfair for the judges to criticize the props and staging, since even Tom makes it clear it's a network tie-in to the episode of Castle that follows the show. Tom also coins the phrase "sarcopha-guy". In the... you know, I'm just gonna call it the Skybox (coined by Evan on this week's results show) because "Celebriquarium" is stupid. In the Skybox, Anna is wearing Buzz' hat making her look a bit like Marlene Dietrich.

Niecy & Louis: They will be a 1960's interracial couple, and there are tears on both sides. Waltz. She's very much moved by the theme and music, so much that she pays no attention to her steps. Stumbles, some nice shapes. No lift, not enough strength. 18/30

Very big respect to Louis, who talked about still not being able to love and marry as he might want to, and continued to mention those same themes in interview segments after dancing. Okay, so it wasn't a big secret to anyone who watches the show, but there's nothing easy about coming out, ever.

Chad & Cheryl: He's feeling humbled by not being excellent. Art imitating life as he chases her and is refused. Paso Doble. All very strong and appropriate attitude, but very simple choreography. Well attacked. Needs better posture. 20/30

Jonathan & Tony helped out at the beginning by donning sombreros and maracas. Afterward, they treat us to the Three Amigos salute.

Pamela & Damian: Paso Doble. She loves the matador, but hates the bullfight. Charo comes to teach her Flamenco technique, bringing subtitles. Shaky and with some missed connections, but lots of feeling. Over aggressive. Messy hair is just messy. 21/30

Aiden & Edyta: He has stamina challenges; his family visits. He is a painter whose dream girl comes to life. Quickstep. Well acted, good posture, OK frame. Footwork not bad, needs more drive. Very safe and by the book. 21/30

Only Edyta would have a Ballroom costume sheer enough to see her underpants. Oy.

Erin & Maks: Partnership is all about trust and surrender. They're using a blindfold she says "will either be hot or kinky and inappropriate"; "I want both," says Maks. Great chemistry, excellent presentation, good contact and hold. Nice frame and follow. Make more fluid. 25/30

In the middle of throwing to commercial, Maks blindfolds Tom, who keeps reciting the dialogue from memory. Wow, another reason Tom Bergeron is one of the best live hosts on TV.

Kate & Tony: An acting coach comes to help bring out real emotion from her. Horrible hair weave. Paso Doble. Lady Gaga's "Paparazzi", with him a photographer. No energy at all. Awkwardest arms ever. Clumpy, mincing, totally without attack. Ugh. 10/30

When the camera pans across the stars in front of the Skybox, Niecy can only muster a dismissive-looking golf clap. Awesome.

Nicole & Derek: His stress piling on her stress and so on. Quickstep. Sailors goofing around. Fantastic, bright and effervescent performance. Great expression and very animated and goofy. All performance, a couple of nice figures. 27/30

Yes, they broke hold and yes, they did a lift. But as Jonathan tweeted, why are the judges being harsh about technique when their challenge was story?

RESULTS SHOW

I have to learn to avoid Twitter. Some folks forget about the East Coast/West Coast time difference.

Safe: Aiden & Edyta, Erin & Maks.

Video: Len's review of Monday. Somehow, Len always seems much more pleasant and lighthearted about the routines in retrospect, even ones he bagged on.

Encore: Evan & Anna's Quickstep, still great.

Music Guest: Reba McEntire, "I Want a Cowboy". Can't not love Reba, right? The pro dancing by Maks, Val, Edyta & Snejana is just pretty good and, as Tom notes FTW, "the American West as danced by three Russians and a Pole." Tom actually talks to her, and she admits to Evan, Erin and Nicole being her favorites.

Speaking of Twitter, Val had some pretty lousy things to say about "having" to dance to country music with a country theme, basically dissing the number and the musical guest. So while Maks plays at being a bad boy, little brother is the real douchey deal.

Safe: Niecy & Louis.

Music/Pro Dance: An "acoustic Paso Doble". Derek starts playing Spanish guitar, is joined by Chelsie to dance while Mark gets to sit and be great on guitar. The routine is awesome and the music is great. Loved it.

Safe: Nicole & Derek.

Music Guest: Reba McEntire, "Consider Me Gone". Dmitry and Lacey come on to do a much more interesting and emotional theatrical routine. Good on them.

Video: Melissa Rycroft shows what it's like to be an audience member.

The male celeb for the Design-A-Dance will be Joey Fatone. The song will be "Rock and Roll All Night" by Kiss, and the dance will be Tango. WTF?

Safe: Evan & Anna, Chad & Cheryl (who does indeed do her \o/ thing).

Video: Cast bonding at the practice studio.

Safe: Pamela & Damien, Jake & Chelsie.

RLOD: Buzz & Ashly, Kate & Tony. Len when asked about Jake, Buzz & Kate, basically says that he thinks Kate needs to go. Over on Cafepress.com you can get t-shirts and stuff that say "FREE TONY". Can't argue the sentiment.

Eliminated: Buzz Aldrin & Ashly Costa. Not much of a shocker, but he's extremely gracious. The cast salutes him as he dances, which is nice (even if Chelsie uses her left hand).

Next week's challenge is the Double Score Showdown (they give Tom's voice echo for it). Two scores to be given: one for presentation, one for technique (which will hinge on at least one required element in each routine). I really, really like this and wish they'd do it every week. See you then.
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DWTS - S10 Week 2

"The pressure has never been so intense," says Tom. Uh-huh. Already, we see video of people stressing out. I notice for the first time that the new credits include a cast-standing-abreast-walking-slo-mo-towards-camera shot, and that the band singers are actually vocalizing the "ba-ba-ba-baaa, ba-ba-ba-baaaa" of the theme music. The hell?


Shannen & Mark: She wants simpler, but Mark is making it harder. Jive. Not bad, off time as she's on her own count. Good energy, starting to feel character. Shuffly but good speed. 18/30

Aiden & Edyta: Drama faces, tension, Edyta breaks down and he has to comfort his teacher's nerves. Not cool. Foxtrot. A little more stuff for him to do, but still no challenge. Better feel for music, better posture and frame. She elbows him in face. 18/30

Evan & Anna: He tries to get her to smile in practice, they dance for his hometown. Jive. Excellent energy and expression, good focus on partner. Nice footwork and kicks, but still no pointed toes. Big, fun and light. 24/30

Niecy & Louis: Trouble communicating until he talks in food terms. Foxtrot. Light and graceful, great musicality. More lip synching to help her "feel" character. Solid footwork, nice arms, very clean. 22/30

Jake & Chelsie: Conflict between his potential and his comfort zone. Jive. Bright and high feet and good speed throughout. Nice feel for music, loses time on the same grapevine figure that Shannen lost it on. 20/30

Not only is Chelsie dressed just like Cha Cha DiGregorio from Grease, they cribbed some of the choreography from the "Hand Jive" number.

Buzz & Ashly: He applies himself to the new challenge; his wife Lois visits. Foxtrot. "Fly Me to the Moon", of course. You can see her helping him with steps and counting. A cute, sweet little number. Crooked frame, but that's not what his numbers are about. 14/30

Okay, judges-- 4's? Really? If you ever used a consistent scale, maybe.

In the audience: Louie Vito, Jerry Rice.

Nicole & Derek: They were thinking 50's theme, but got a new song switched on them, so they're scared of Len. Jive. Intro w/ him in the Celebriquarium flirting w/ Pamela. Great choreography to un-Jive music. Super sharp footwork, excellent follow, solid side-by-side. 27/30

Len, of course complains. I'd like to see him choreograph a "traditional" Jive to that song and not have it look ridiculous.

Erin & Maks: She's getting frustrated and upset, and he stays calm. Foxtrot. Great reach and balance. Solid footwork with heel leads. Nice flexibility, good solo work. Nice flow and graceful lines. 25/30

With all the videos of celebs bagging on their pros, Len has "three" words for them which Carrie Ann & Bruno parrot: "Turn up, keep up and shut up."

Pamela & Damian: She's way more focused and into it than expected. Foxtrot. Marylin Monroe character that she is solid on. Great smoothness and feel for music. Ironically, she is not filling out the top line of her frame and needs posture work. 21/30

Tom FTW on her character: "A busload of Kennedys just pulled up."

Chad & Cheryl: Cheryl's tough and he's too flirty all the time, but gets a kiss on the cheek for being good. Foxtrot. Lost the looseness of last week. Tight up top, posture off, butt out. Needs to work on feeling. 15/30

Kate & Tony: She's questioning his teaching technique, so he quits (!) then comes back. Jive. Stiff and awkward, counting out loud and struggling to keep up. Scared to death during the whole thing. 12/30

No, we did not get to see the scene of the producers talking Tony into coming back to work with such a disrespectful student. Bruno FTW: He totally calls her a Stepford Wife.

RESULTS SHOW

And we're getting right to it. Safe: Buzz & Ashly (Whoa, last place in scores and safe. Interesting.) RED LIGHT OF DOOOOOOOOOOM: Pamela & Damien.

Video package: Len reviews Monday night. No excuse for some of the harsher comments he made.

BTW, Erin & Maks are dating. Big surprise.

Encore: Nicole & Derek's Jive. This time, Derek is consoling Pamela up in the Celebriquarium.

Pro number: Ballroom "Fusion" routine choreographed by Travis Payne & Stacy Walker. Derek, Anna, Tony, Cheryl, Maks, Chelsie, Louis, Ashly, Damien & Edyta (basically, everyone but Mark).

Video: "Between the Mirrorballs" with Adam Corolla (who I thought was funny at the time, but now I don't like the guy, long story).

Safe: Aiden & Edyta, Niecy & Louis.

The female celeb for this season's Design-A-Dance will be Melissa Rycroft.

Musical guest: Beach Boys with John Stamos (who I have also recently learned is a tool), with a medley. Cheryl, Ashly and Anna come out during "California Girls" (Anna being the "northern girl" LOL), with Damian, Maks & Louis.

Video: "The Len Commandments". Thou shalt not: ...kill time; ...take the judges' names in vain; ...steal each other's dance moves; ...interrupt Len; ...do lifts. Thou shalt: ...have rhinestones; ...honor the judges with gifts and attention.

Safe: Evan & Anna, Jake & Chelsie, Nicole & Derek.

Macy Stars of Dance: Tribute to the Haiti with Haitian performers, including the World Mambo Champion who lost his young son in the earthquake. Awesome dancing.

Video: Brooke Burke's new workday.

Safe: Erin & Maks, Chad & Cheryl. Interesting to note the last three are all supposed "divas" (Pamela, Shannen & Kate). Kate & Tony, and the bitchface is strong in reaction. RLOD: Shannen & Mark.

Eliminated: Shannen Doherty & Mark Ballas. Surprised to see Mark being helped down the stairs by Tony. They reveal that Mark injured his knee and will be out for 6 weeks after surgery, so she would have been dancing with Corky Ballas if not eliminated. She is happy to have made it long enough to honor her father.

Challenge for next week: every routine must tell a story. There are definitely pros for whom this will be a strength, and some it will not.
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DWTS - S10 Week 1

Another cycle of DWTS, let's see what "Season" 10 has in store for us.

Tom tells us that there have been 27 professionals and 104 celebrity partners on the show (name 'em all!) so far. The new graphics and opening titles are all shiny and nifty, with the couples now greenscreened into a cityscape near big glowy names instead of the old 70's kaleidoscope effect. It even extends to a projection on the dance floor.

Of course, the most important new thing to see? Our new co-host, Brooke Burke! Yay! Somehow, Samantha Harris decided that her gigs other places should take priority and I couldn't be happier because I don't watch any of those shows.

Here come the couples, some looking quite elegant and graceful. Edyta is wearing a trenchcoat as if anyone will be surprised when she takes it off (spoiler alert!). Instead of the old Red Room, the studio now features a glass-walled room complete with an extra little balcony so that these people will always be on display. They've dubbed it the "Celebriquarium" and I don't like it already.

Time to dance.


Chad Ochocinco & Cheryl Burke: He asks to be drilled and worked hard, which works for her. Cha Cha. Solid-ish footwork, light. Good focus and musicality. Some stiffness and hesitation, half decent arms. 18/30

New scoring graphics, even. Now the judges are in a little box, their paddles are repeated in boxes beside them and the total score is tallied beneath for the truly lazy.

Shannen Doherty & Mark Ballas: She's doing it for her dad but is terrified of performing; he calls self "Prince of Ballroom". Viennese Waltz. Tough choreography, but clean. Solid foundation, decent footwork, needs more emotion. 18/30

In the audience: Helio, Jonathan (who has an awful seat), Tim Allen, Marlee and Joanna.

Erin Andrews & Maksim Chmerkovskiy: She, perfectionist, wanted the tough teacher; he: "they always ask for me, they always regret it". Fun couple. Cha Cha. Good footwork, great timing, excellent attitude & flexibility. Needs leg strength. 21/30

Jake Pavelka & Chelsie Hightower: He says The Bachelor is not a competition (not for him, yeah) and wants to be good right away; she gives good advice on that. Viennese Waltz. Nice movement, knows steps, on time. Improve posture & upper body. 19/30

Niecy Nash & Louis van Amstel: She likes her "jiggly parts" and doesn't want to lose weight. Cha Cha. Good expression, but a lip syncher. Fast, clean feet. Needs more snap and energy. Nice ending. 17/30

Evan Lysacek & Anna Trebunskaya: He's been called too technical in skating and has trouble turning in a new direction. Viennese Waltz. Excellent posture and extension and hands. Point toes and connect more to partner. Very polished. 23/30

We get a quick hello from some astronauts on the International Space Station. Awesome.

Buzz Aldrin & Ashly Costa: He's 80, a risk-taker and thought "this is a cute babe" on meeting her. Concern over memorizing steps. Cha Cha. Shaky and hesitant, needs to count but still off time. Fun and cute and he's enjoying it. 12/30

Nicole Scherzinger & Derek Hough: A lot of dorkiness between them; a new challenge for her. Viennese Waltz. Nicely soft and elegant. Great extension and balance, nice frame. Okay footwork, nice feeling for music. 24/30

Aiden Turner & Edyta Sliwinksa: He's goofier than you'd guess; she keeps flirting. Cha Cha. Oh surprise, she takes off jacket. Yawn. Has his timing, knows steps, lacks some flex and musicality. Lousy choreography with nothing for him to do as usual. 16/30

Kate Gosselin & Tony Dovolani: We don't see the first meeting. Interesting. He mentions her bitchface, she calls it insecurity. Viennese Waltz. Awkward and stiff, needs to drive and attack steps. Nervous expression, but she keeps up. 14/30

Pamela Anderson & Damien Whitewood: Both new with lots to prove. Her hair is out of control at all times. Cha Cha. Much stronger than expected, clean feet. Good connection and expression. Shaky overall. Enjoying it. 17/30

No elimination this week for some reason or other.
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Wednesday, November 18, 2009

DWTS - S9 Week 9

It's week nine, the semifinals, which means it's time for the video of the DWTS "mirror ball" trophy surrounded by smoke and lights. Our lineup tonight includes three female celebrities and one male, which I believe might just be unprecedented. They've got three "full" (meaning, I suppose, not part of group numbers) routines to dance tonight: one Ballroom dance, one Latin and the "Knockout" dance they prepared weeks ago during the dance-offs. In addition, each couple's Latin routine must include a solo by the celebrity, not my favorite gimmick at all.


Donny & Kym: Despite having done an awesome Argentine Tango, they bring in Gilles ("I'm on Brothers & Sisters, also on ABC") Marini to help with the romance and passion: "make people uncomfortable", he advises. The music is awful, way better suited to Foxtrot than Tango. Kym's foot catches and tears the hem of her skirt, which throws them both off. Donny loses his performance focus even though his footwork is clean. He feels really bad about it, and you can't help but feel bad for him. 7.5/10.0

Donny's so distraught, he lays down on the floor. Tom's reaction? "Somebody call the paramedics, we have another Osmond down! Another Osmond down!" Donny blames seeing Marie in the audience for losing his focus. Marie, standing next to Tom Bergeron, protests.

Joanna & Derek: The rehearsals are getting rough, Derek is pushing hard and getting frustrated. Brooke Burke visits to joke around and make fun of Derek. Viennese Waltz. The opening is simple and pretty and so is the entire routine. Very understated and classic, not a lot of flash, but that's the right call. Nice lines, and a good start to body stretch, but still lacking grounding. Carrie Ann, of course, has to criticize her and makes some pointless comment about her arms and not her feet, which have been iffy all season. 9.0/10.0

Kelly & Louis: With a family dog dying, the "new" more motivated Kelly is pushing through and practicing instead of falling apart, and is not intimidated by the Rumba, which for some reason they're doing instead of their Ballroom. She's feeling the music, really thoughtful and soft in performance. The solo isn't so great. Decent technique, some hips, a bit shaky on some of her lines. She does, though, do the last one where she's braced on one foot against Louis and he's holding on to the other and nothing else pretty well. 7.5/10.0

Apparently, Kelly's feet were in such pain she had a shot to numb them, which must somehow explain the flip-flop of their dances.

Mya & Dmitry: She brings in a white board to remind them of the practice rules, the last of which is ironically that Dmitry is in charge. Sure. Waltz. Excellent technique, and not overdone or trying too hard. Very graceful. Their dance hold is off, I think she's a bit misaligned. Still a lack of chemistry and connection between them beyond the technique. They also do a lift at the end, but Carrie Ann Inconistent doesn't catch it. 9.0/10.0

In the audience: Helio Castroneves. During the next section, the intro video will be a little history of each celebrity.

Donny & Kym: Man, his kids totally look like him. Samba to his own "One Bad Apple", cute. Lots of great energy, some good hips going and lots of feeling. He's really in the music, a great change in his performance. His solo has some nice steps and content, and he really looks like he's having fun. He'll never be as hard and sharp as some others, but he'll always be very smooth. 8.5/10.0

Joanna & Derek: Single mom + two girls left Communist Poland. Mom, it seems, passed on very good genes to both her daughters. Cha Cha. She starts with the solo, slinking on the stage with some great swivel and hip action. The full fringe pants, I'm betting, are Derek's idea, highlighting her best technique and camouflaging her weaknesses. Very sharp movement, great connection and lead & follow. 9.0/10.0

Kelly & Louis: Her unusual upbringing and history make her adventurous and resilient. Quickstep. Random song, super fast for Quickstep. Great technique, especially the Charleston footwork in the corner which might be the best of the season. Slightly off during a jump. Bright and fun performance, nice choreography, points for keeping up the speed. 9.5/10.0

Mya & Dmitry: She was taught tap by her mom out of a library book. Salsa, although their song "La Isla Bonita" is a Samba and the arrangement even more so. Lots of great rhythm, very fast music. Good hip action and Latin motion, nice follow. They do a variation on the neck-drop-to-foot trick that works very well. Her solo is strong, but it's easy in this dance and something like Cha Cha. 9.5/10.0

Len's comment is "Tutti Fruitti, what a booty". No, seriously.

Video package: the prep of the Knockout dances. Interesting to note that it's been a couple of weeks since any of them have practiced these routines, and none of them were called upon to use them for a dance-off. Apparently, celebrities being asked to do three routines in one night is also unprecedented.

Donny & Kym: Jitterbug. Good call. We finally get to see those gaudy spangly green costumes in action. It's Donny's signature high energy and solid technique. Some good tricks, lots of fun. 9.5/10.0

Joanna & Derek: Salsa. Excellent energy, very sharp movement, lots of great swivels. Good connection, some callback to their neck drop. Lots of Derek mugging. 9.5/10.0

Kelly & Louis: Cha Cha. Adorable look with the pink/black costumes. Great musicality. Very sharp, excellent arms and hands. Solid performance. 8.0/10.0

Mya & Dmitry: Cha Cha. Good technique. Clearly from a while ago, as the choreography isn't as tight and interesting as what he's doing lately. Some tricks, good footwork, still not quite together. 8.5/10.0

Results show. They've ramped up the drama music. Tom calls it the most "entertainment-packed" show ever, and considering the lineup, he's not far wrong.

Encore: Mya & Dmitry's Salsa. Some parts of it actually work better tonight than last night. The Wife and some friends share our less-than-totally-impressed view of this couple. One common comment was that when speaking, Mya's words seem to come off a little disingenuous, a little fake. I notice on Twitter (a great way to follow the action and find out things closer to the stars' and celebs' real feelings) that no matter how much everyone gushes about everyone else, the one exception is that nobody seems to be especially close or affectionate with Mya.

We find out that the reason Kelly's solo last night looked off was that she'd forgotten her choreography and was improvising it. Wow.

They bring up the four couples to the stage and fake them out. Instead, we get a video package of each contestant sizing up their competition.

We're treated to a performance of the song "Be Italian", as staged in the upcoming movie musical Nine. The movie's number is re-created and adapted for the studio, with a dancer filling in for the really-surprisingly-good-at-the-song Fergie, who plays the Whore in the movie (no seriously, that's the character). The number is good and well-staged. I'm really looking forward to the movie.

Musical guest: Alicia Keys, "Try Sleeping With A Broken Heart". She has her own two couples for dancers, and they're quite good. She's wearing thigh-high blue suede high-heel boots that seem to have no zippers.

Video: The celebs lip sync to Queen's "Under Pressure". The sync quality varies greatly, but Joanna, Kelly and especially Donny seem to get into the overdramatics with gusto. There are dresses torn, mirror balls smashed and high heel dance shoes set on fire. Very funny, mostly for Donny.

They bring the two higher-scoring couples to the stage, and inform Mya & Dmitry that they've made it to the finals. No surprise, but a little disappointment here. We find her the most technically talented, but least interesting to watch dance.

Musical guest: Leona Lewis, "Happy". Four couples to dance in a floor full of smoke, and using huge black sheets as props. Um, okay.

The lower-scoring couples come to the stage. Donny is moved to the finals and is very relieved.

Musical guest: the Bee Gees, "You Should Be Dancing". It's their 50th Anniversary, wow. They can still hit the falsetto, but the song just doesn't sound right with just the two of them. Tony, Cheryl, Chelsie and Artem (making one of his occasional appearances) dance some Hustle, and then Tony dances with his partner from last season, Melissa Rycroft who gets to dance barefoot, probably because she couldn't get used to the heels again fast enough. I note that Tony has no trouble lifting her over his head either, so he must only have trouble with Cheryl. The audience is on its feet clapping along. We see Sharon grooving, but Ozzy looks especially confused by the disco music.

Video package: We actually spend some time with the professionals, watching backstage footage of them creating the pro routines. It's interesting to watch the interplay of the egos and creative forces. They get worked up, but we don't see any fighting, and clearly they know how to work together to make great results.

And it's time to announce the third couple in the finals, and it's Kelly & Louis.

Eliminated: Joanna Krupa & Derek Hough. He's totally ready for it. She sounds really sincere in her thanks. Probably the worst part of it all is that Derek was promising a freestyle that would blow their futuristic Paso "out of the water", and I believe it. Instead of a last dance, surprisingly, they're asked to encore their Viennese Waltz from last night. It's still a great routine, and she dances it well.

Finals next week. See you there.
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